Guest Post: Learning (the hard way) how to be an At Home Mom

This post was written by Heather Dugdale.  I’m always looking to highlight different perspectives of motherhood, and when I stumbled on Heather’s blog, I knew she’d be perfect.  Heather is the author of the blog where she chronicles her life with kids and shares her humorous insights about learning how to be a mom and trying to have easy family fun.  Thanks Heather!

When I found out my job was eliminated in October 2010, I cried. Partly because a job that I absolutely loved was no longer available to me, but mostly because I was terrified of being a stay at home mom (when I say that phrase I hear that ominous echo voice that they put on the Today Show when Al Roker says “Sunday, Sunday, Sunday” when it’s football season).

My husband’s first comment to me was “It’s ok honey, if you eat one of the children, we can always make more”. And we make some pretty cute ones. I have three beautiful blonde girls who are the most rambunctious, mouthy, loving kids you could meet. I don’t know where they get the mouthy & rambunctious part!

Although I was terrified, when I woke up on January 1, I decided I was going to enjoy every minute of my stay at home motherhood, and also follow the advice from a calendar that my mom had given me for Christmas. It’s entitled “Life is All About How You Handle Plan B”. I’m tellin’ ya, I’ve taken full advantage of this Plan B thing (and no, I have not enjoyed every minute, but I have managed to find the humor in most of those minutes).

Here are the Top 7 stay at home motherhood lessons I’ve learned the hard way:

1) Girls Night Out is code for “essential therapy without which I would actually eat my young.”
2) “Stay at home” mom is code for “at the gym, grocery store, dance studio, soccer field, insert child’s activity location here, child’s classroom, and any of the other 15 places I’m needed other than home”.
3) Hurry up and wait is a way of life.
4) Sitting down is not an option. The time you actually sit down when you’re “at home” is less than 45 minutes, and all of those minutes are spent in the car on your way to the activities you decided would make your kids “well rounded”.
5) Those closets you thought you’d clean out are still as cluttered as ever, and might be more so because you are home now so you can stuff a bunch more crap in them.
6) The exhaustion you feel is because you have just been verbally poked for hours straight by miniature versions of yourself.
7) If the CIA wants an effective form of torture – they should put terrorists in a minivan at 4pm with three children who have not had a snack or a nap.

I am a Triathlete, a Philanthropic Strategist, a Volunteer, an An Entrepreneur, and a new Stay at home mommy…and I’ve never been so exhausted, busy or happy in my entire life!

Want to hear more from Heather?  Check out her blog Recovering Working Mom!

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  1. Love this post! I’ve been considering being a SAHM/WAHM full-time after this baby is born since my daughter will be in school, and I’m a little nervous. It’s nice to know I wouldn’t be alone in the journey figuring it all out.

    Tiffany at Mom’s Daily Zen

  2. I loved this post. It’s funny how we always have a grass is always greener perspective. I have worked since my daughter was 2 months old, she is now 14. And there were so many times I wished I was a stay at home mom. I’d have dinner with stay at home mom friends who wished they worked! Either way, our kids are fine because they know we love them! I blog about the adventures of being a mom to a 14-year old, as well as a humorous slant on dealing with middle age.
    Thanks for the post – Lisa

  3. Thanks for this post! It’s always so interesting to hear the “other side of the coin”. I work outside the home full time, but have a goal of working from home part time. I always said I wasn’t cut out to be a SAHM – isn’t that horrible? lol Now, that’s all I want!

    • Hi Krysta:

      That absolutely isn’t horrible. Now that I’ve had it both ways I know first hand that one isn’t better than the other. Now that I’m at home I’m more disorganized than ever and can’t seem to put a sentence together. I miss those days when I could go to lunch with my girlfriends or grocery shop at lunch. It’s surprising how much more time you have to do those things when you’re working outside the home. I always thought there would be so much more time when I stayed home, and now I’m realizing that if I don’t find a tutor for myself, my children might flunk elementary school because I’m having to do homework with them. Who knew?! Whatever you do, enjoy the quality time with your kids and surround yourself with girlfriends who will make you laugh at all of the crazy things we mommies get ourselves into!! :-)

  4. I am a stay at home mom. I can relate to all of the above. :-)


  5. Hi there! I’m visiting from One Moment in Time’s blog hop. I love your blog!! I am a SAHM as well, and love all the points in the article and comments. Good stuff! I’ve followed you and hope you can follow back. Thanks – Lynn @ Scrapity Anne

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